Who came up with chocolate?
by Avahin
Summary: Remus can’t, for the life of him, remember when people started associating him with chocolate. After all, he loves a good medium rare steak above all other foods. RL/SB


Remus can't, for the life of him, remember when people started associating him with chocolate. It was an absolutely ridiculous notion, chocolate being his favorite food in the world, his most coveted item. An absolutely ridiculous notion because a good medium rare steak was his favorite food in the world and his most coveted item was a nice muggle television. He hadn't had many chances to watch muggle television, but the few that he did, he greatly enjoyed. In fact, in an ideal world, he would have a good medium rare steak in front of a muggle television watching one of their so called sitcoms based on daily life. This was not to say, of course, that he disliked chocolate. Not at all. A good bar of chocolate was comparable to a good book, which he very much appreciated. Speaking of which, he also had no idea when people started associating him with books. For the past five years, he had been receiving chocolate and books as gifts. It wasn't that he didn't like them, he just wished they would stop and get him something else, like a chess set. He was pretty tired of having to play chess using someone else's set. Generally the pieces would revolt against him, unable to accept him as their true master. Or, he would appreciate some new pajamas. His own were getting worn out, and even though the dormitory was kept at a comfortable temperature, whenever James or Sirius would open the window to let in some "fresh air" in the winter time, Remus would always wake up freezing. Or he would like –

"Some quills?" Sirius finished in order to shut Remus up from his rant. For Merlin's sake, he only wanted to know if Remus would like some chocolate from Honeydukes.

Remus narrowed his golden eyes and pursed his lips into a frown. "And another thing, why does everyone assume that I enjoy school supplies? Do I honestly have the feel of a bookish person?"

Sirius sighed and unwrapped the bar of chocolate in his hands. "If you would stop spending your free time with your nose stuck in a book, maybe people would quit thinking of you as a nerd." He bit off a piece and enjoyed the taste of the bittersweet candy as it melted down his throat.

"I do not spend _all_ of my free time reading," Remus retorted as his eyes unwillingly watched the chocolate bar being devoured by a perfect red mouth. "I cannot possibly spend _that much_ free time reading with you, James, and Peter constantly playing pranks. Do you have any idea how _hard_ it is to keep up with you three much less keep you out of trouble?"

"Nope," Sirius answered matter of factly as he popped the last piece in his mouth and licked away the residue on his elegant fingertips. Then he placed to fingers right above Remus' temple and started rubbing the area in circles. "And maybe you should stop trying to stay out of trouble. You'll just give yourself worry lines." He took his fingers back as Remus sighed and pulled out another bar of chocolate from his pocket. "You know, I hear that chocolate is good for keeping young."

"How much chocolate do you have?" Remus asked as Sirius unwrapped the second bar and started gulping it down.

"Loads," Sirius grinned as he began emptying his pockets of the delicious treat. "Want some?" He picked up another bar and waved it under Remus' fine nose, forcing the other boy to smell the candy.

"No, I do not want any chocolate," Remus snapped back as he snatched the chocolate away from Sirius. "But I'm confiscating all of that." He started loading the pile of sweets into his pockets, expecting Sirius to protest.

"But it's not illegal," Sirius answered as he leaned back on the couch lazily. He smirked as he saw Remus' pockets full and still half the pile in between them. Unlike Remus, Sirius had long ago placed an Undetectable Extension Charm placed on his pockets. It made life much easier, and he found that he could carry anything in his pockets, including Peter Pettigrew as a rat. Even though Peter often protested against such acts, Sirius knew he secretly enjoyed it.

"But you're going to grow fat and your teeth are going to rot. And if that happens, what will all the poor young ladies at Hogwarts do without your good looks?" Remus asked sweetly and sarcastically as he shoved the rest of the chocolate into his bag.

Sirius grinned and pulled Remus down next to him so that their foreheads were touching. "Don't you mean what will _you_ do without my good looks?" Sirius asked as he leaned in for a kiss.

Remus pulled back, but not fast enough to miss the sweet taste of chocolate still lingering on his lips. "Don't worry about me, Sirius. I've still got James to lust after," Remus joked. He laughed at Sirius sour face as he stood and picked up his bag. "Prefect rounds," he explained as Sirius' face turned into a pouting one. "With a Miss Lily Evans," he said as the girl stormed into the Common Room. "Don't wait up." He winked just as James followed in after her and raced over to sit next to Sirius.

"Remus John Lupin," the young woman said sternly as she grabbed him by the wrist. "Hurry up."

"What's wrong, Lily?" Remus replied in his normal gentle voice as he shook his wrist slightly to loosen her grip. He turned around to glare at James who likely just made his rounds an hour and a half of listening to her complain. "Have some chocolate." He pulled out one of Sirius' bars and handed it to her.

"You know exactly what's wrong," she answered in a huff as she let go of him and took the chocolate. As she did so, she managed to see his bag practically overflowing with candy. A carefully shaped eyebrow raised quizzically as she said, "You really like chocolate, don't you?"

Remus sighed as James mumbled to Sirius, "Can't you keep your womanizing boyfriend away from my woman?"

Sirius laughed and replied, "Only if you can keep your woman to yourself."

---

Remus had finally gotten rid of Sirius' chocolate after a week of carrying the stuff with him everywhere. He didn't chance leaving it away from him, as he didn't want Sirius to get any, but he ended up giving half of it back to him anyway. A fourth of the chocolate, he gave to acquaintances that he passed by during the week, and ate the other fourth by himself. Just as he thought he was in the clear from the stuff, Valentine's Day passed by.

Remus awoke on Feburary 14th at a rather appropriate hour. The sun was shining brightly through the frosted glass windows, and he could hear a few crazy birds chirping in an attempt to make spring come sooner. He grinned to himself as he sat up in bed and rubbed his bleary eyes clear. The first thing he saw was Sirius sleeping in the bed next to him, dozing with his mouth slightly open and drool dripping out of it. Despite that, Remus still found him charming and was about to creep over to wake him up, when he saw the pile of wrapped boxes at the foot of Sirius' bed. Knowing that it could not possibly be Sirius' birthday, his gaze drifted over to the end of his own bed to find an even bigger pile of boxes there. One sniff from his keen nose told him that all of it was the sticky sweet goodness that he had just escaped.

He groaned with frustration as he grumpily got out of bed and went to the bathroom. After brushing his teeth and taking a shower, he walked back into the dormitory hoping that it would all be gone. To his dismay, not only was the pile still there, but his bed was now also holding Sirius Black, James Potter, and Peter Pettigrew, all of whom were perplexed by the amount of Valentine's chocolate on Remus' bed.

"Remus," Peter began with his mouth agape and eyes open wide. "You sure have a lot of admirers this year."

"Remus always has a lot of admirers," James responded as he picked up a box and read the label. "The real question is how come he has more than I do."

"The _real_ question is when did Remus become such a ladies man, so much so that even I can't compete," Sirius corrected as he too picked up a box and shook it.

"No," James shook his head as he held up a carefully wrapped box tied with a white ribbon. "The _really real_ question is why did Lily give chocolate to him and not to me."

Remus sighed and shoved aside some of the chocolates to give himself a place to sit on the overcrowded bed. "I don't know. I have no clue. And if you want them, you can have them, James." He picked up some of the boxes himself and started unwrapping them to see if any of them contained anything other than chocolate. He started off reading the names, intent on thanking the people as he was a polite young man, but quickly gave up, and not long after that, also abandoned the task of unwrapping all the small little boxes. "Why are there so many boxes of bloody chocolate?" he asked rhetorically while glaring at Sirius who shrugged at him innocently before trying to inconspicuously slide over to his own bed.

"I don't want them," James responded as he gently placed the box he was still holding to the side. "I wouldn't feel right. There is no honor in taking the chocolate of another man," he declared as he puffed out his chest and pounded his right fist against the left side of his upper body. "On the other hand, if you need help eating Lily's chocolate, I would be more than willing to do that."

Remus rolled his eyes as he grinned. "Breakfast first," he said as he pushed all the chocolates off his bed save for Lily's, knowing that James would cry if he shoved them aside and that Lily would berate him for not taking care of a gift she specifically prepared for him.

All three of the other boys groaned at Remus' sense of maturity which, they felt, was terribly misplaced. However, none of them protested and the four of them were downstairs in the Dining Hall within half an hour and happily enjoying the act of filling their stomachs with delicious food before classes when two girls stopped right next to Remus and tapped him on the shoulder. He finished gulping down a piece of toast lathered with jam and faced them with a very quizzical look.

"Good morning," he said in a polite tone and the two giggled. "Can I help you?"

They giggled again before asking in soft and high pitched voices, "Did you like the chocolates? We made them ourselves."

Remus blushed out of embarrassment from not even remembering who they were much less having tried their chocolates. He grinned sheepishly at them and said, "Sorry, I haven't tried them yet, but I'm sure their delicious if you made them." Then he turned back to his food and heard them whispering as they giggled once more and walked away.

"Oh boy, Remus," James said. "Did you hear them? They think you're so cute about being embarrassed about receiving homemade chocolate. I never knew you were such an innocent boy, especially not since I keeping finding you and Sirius snogging practically everywhere."

"Shut up, James," Remus muttered as his face reddened even further. "Maybe you would find us snogging if you stopped trying to find us while we're clearly together on the Map."

Before James could say another word, another group of girls approached Remus and asked him the same question. Again, he answered that he had not tried them yet but he appreciated the gift.

The other three stared at Remus as he wolfed down five heart-shaped pancakes smothered in syrup.

"Do you know them?" Peter asked, pretty certain that he had never seen them before.

"Vaguely," Remus responded. "I think they're third years."

"Remus," Lily called out before anyone could say any more.

"Before you ask," Remus said, "I have not tried your chocolates, but thank you very much, and I'm sure they're delicious."

Lily laughed as she sat down next to Remus and piled some waffles onto her plate. "You're welcome. I figured I would pay you back for the chocolate from last week, since you like it so much. I also told some of my friends who think you're a sweetheart about your love for chocolate and they decided to give you some too. Did you get them?"

"Probably," Remus grumbled back. "You know, Lily, I don't really-" Remus was cut off by a gruff "ahem" from behind him.

He turned around and saw a seventh-year Ravenclaw standing behind him looking rather bashful. "Hi, Remus. Happy Valentine's day."

"You too," Remus replied hesitantly. There was an awkward moment as the boy stood there and Remus watched him from an awkwardly twisted position. "Is there anything else?"

"O-Oh, yeah. I wanted to know if you liked my chocolates. It's imported from Sweden."

"Thank you, but I haven't gotten a chance to eat them yet. I really appreciate the sentiment."

"Oh, okay," he said almost definitively, but still didn't move. Remus stared for a minute longer before turning around. "W-wait. Did you read the card?"

Remus smiled apologetically and shook his head. "Sorry." The other boy nodded and walked away briskly and Remus turned back around to find James and Lily trying hard not to crack up, Sirius glaring after the Ravenclaw, and Peter watching Remus with an awkward expression. He sighed, giving in to the fact that it was going to be a long day. After stuffing down another stack of heart pancakes, he stood up, announced that it was time to go to class, and left before anyone else could accost him with questions of chocolate.

---

The rest of Remus' day went similarly to breakfast. After there were a couple private confessions, Remus tried hard not to be left alone and Sirius made sure not to let Remus out of his sight. Finally, when that didn't work, Sirius barked at anyone who came close to Remus and told them to back off. Though the two never explicitly announced to the school that they were a couple, it was becoming increasingly obvious as, by the end of the day, Sirius had his arm around Remus' waist and was constantly pulling him closer whenever he saw someone approach Remus with a purpose. If he thought that the person coming was especially strong-minded, he threw in another arm for a tight hug, which Remus reciprocated willingly.

At the end of the day, the two of them were curled comfortably next to each other on the couch in front of the fireplace. It was an extremely coveted place for couples especially on Valentine's Day, but they had made claim on it by kicking out the couple on it before. Or rather, Sirius had done so, while Remus apologized for his behavior.

"Sirius, I have decided that it is all your fault," Remus said during the end of one of their avid conversations.

"Hmm?" he asked as he pulled Remus closer to himself.

"All this chocolate on Valentine's Day," Remus looked up at him with warm brown eyes that lit up with malicious intents.

"How so?" Sirius obliged as he stared back with equally warm gray eyes.

"Because of your chocolate last week that I was giving out. Apparently, it gave people the wrong idea that I was in love with them. That as well as the already widely accepted notion that I _absolutely adore_ chocolate caused people to decide that the time was now to confess their love with _my favorite food _ in the _entire_ world."

Sirius laughed heartily and Remus placed his head on Sirius' chest, enjoying the lulling sensation of the ticklish vibrations mixed with the deep timbre of Sirius' voice. "I would say that that's mostly your fault. If you had just let me keep the chocolate, none of this would have happened."

"Lies," Remus retorted quietly. "You better find some way to make up for this fiasco."

"Hmm," Sirius chuckled softly. "I think I can do that." Sirius kissed the top of Remus' head and then lifted it up so he could kiss the pale pink lips. Remus kissed him back gently, before letting a tongue escape from his now parted lips and allowing it to make its way into Sirius' warm mouth. As Sirius' tongue reached out to meet his, he tasted chocolate.

Remus slowly broke away from Sirius and accused, "You've been eating your chocolates, haven't you?"

Sirius rolled his eyes and tangled his long fingers in Remus' hair. "Not everyone's like you, love. Besides, it would have been a waste if I didn't."

Remus brought his arms around Sirius and placed his forehead against the other's. "But isn't that like accepting their feelings?"

"Of all the people allowed to be jealous today, Remus, you are not one of them," Sirius grinned before pressing his lips back against Remus' to efficiently shut him up. Despite his unwillingness to hear Remus complain, he was glad that Remus was doing so. After all, it had taken awhile to get the other boy to open up to him and even longer to get him to be selfish and admit to wanting things.

---

James and Peter made sure that Remus tried a bit of everybody's chocolate as Sirius watched with a scowl until Remus offered him some of the left over chocolate. Of course, he offered everyone some of the left over chocolate, but Sirius didn't really care about that. Chocolate was chocolate. It was then that Remus realized Sirius honest to Merlin _adored_ chocolate. Though Sirius reminded Remus nothing of chocolate, nor had he ever bothered to associate the sweet with Sirius, Remus realized the Sirius would be happy eating nothing but chocolate all his life. Though he kept trying to keep Sirius from eating too much, he allowed himself to let the other boy indulge in the sweet goodness more than he had before. Besides, watching Sirius Black eat chocolate was perhaps one of the most mesmerizing and seductive sights he had ever seen. And it was through him, that Remus ridded himself of all that chocolate in less than a month.

Just like before, Remus was sure that he was through with chocolate when his birthday rolled around and at the foot of his bed was a pile of chocolate and books. He let out another frustrated groan as he set to unwrapping the presents. It seemed that, despite Sirius' possessive behavior on Valentine's Day, not many of his suitors had given up trying to win over his heart. He was, however, more pleased with this pile than he had been on Valentine's Day. For one, there was less chocolate, and another, the books weren't half bad, some of them he had actually planned on getting for himself at one point or another. As well, his closest friends had diverged from the rest and gotten him things that he liked or wanted. For example, Lily knitted him a lovely scarf, Peter found a set of quills, and James got him his own chess set. Remus was not set off by the lack of gift from Sirius, knowing that Sirius would have one for him later.

All in all, his birthday went much better than Valentine's Day did, though there were still the occasional questions about whether or not Remus enjoyed the chocolates and once in awhile a bashful student would attempt to give Remus a personal note, which Sirius always snatched up, read quickly, and then tore up before Remus had a chance to look at it.

That night, Sirius and Remus were once again cuddled in front of the fireplace all alone. Sirius had gotten Remus a new set of pajamas which, despite what he had really wanted to get, were very warm and all covering. Remus grinned, knowing full well what it was Sirius would have preferred to have gotten Remus, and kissed him soundly for a thank you. He then put them on and insisted on warming up in front of the fire place.

After a lull in the conversation, Remus asked Sirius, "Did you see all that chocolate?"

Sirius smiled, knowing what was next to come. "Yes."

"It's all your fault," Remus turned to look at him with the brown eyes that flickered gold sometimes, but were usually a sweet chocolate color.

"I know," Sirius responded as he kissed the top of Remus' warm chocolate-colored hair and pulled him closer.

Remus kissed him back on the lips and sat up straight. "You can have it all, if you want, because I know your secret," he whispered as he pressed their lips together again and licked away the familiar taste.

"What is it?" Sirius muttered back when they broke apart for a gasp of air. His hands roamed down the flannel covered back which, despite its paleness always seemed warm to him.

"_You're_ the one that loves chocolate and are using me as your scapegoat so that no one knows your secret," Remus revealed with a wide and pleased grin.

Sirius chuckled in return and wrapped Remus in a warm embrace. "You got me. I love chocolate," Sirius admitted as he pulled Remus into another kiss. _Because it reminds me of you all time._

With the satisfaction of winning, Remus responded eagerly and passionately to Sirius' mouth all the while thinking that the taste of chocolate isn't so bad even though he's had it for the past month and a half.

---

A/N: Just a random little nonsensical one-shot. If you think about it, Remus never actually said that he adored chocolate; he just kept forcing it on Harry. Also, it's not very smooth, sorry. Taking my time getting back into fanfic mode.


End file.
